I would love to be able to translate this completely in English. Sadly, I'm not as proficient in Japanese, and am only limited to giving summaries, if I can even understand them. Unlike that other story I dropped, this anko is too awesome to remain untranslated.
Like I said in post #15186, it makes more sense if you've seen yakuza movies like Takashi Miike's gangster films, or pretty much anything by Takeshi Kitano.