Even without translation the story seems pretty straight-forward to me. Patchouli is bothering Anon cause she wants attention, Anon gets pissed off when Patchouli throws a fit (possibly insults) and punishes her.
Patchy also wants...PATCHY ALSO WANTS TO BE LIKE CACTUS WWAAAAAAAA!!Can mister cactus do mister "surfing"?You just said you want to be like the cactus right?Wha'ss big sis' dooiing??YU?Cactus...
Patchy...MUUBII!DUUWWAAAA'!! CAN' DAK' IDASDFGHJ... *cough*muu... muukii... kyupuu... yukyukii...muu...Hmmm... probably.Yukkuri Bar, Baidu